Homeschooling "High School"

Well, it's official: We'll be homeschooling until my daughter is ready to leave home for a 4-year college or university.

That was my plan even this past fall. But then my daughter felt she wanted the high school experience, for social reasons, including being part of something larger, being in the theater program, working on the school paper, etc. Because I didn't want to compromise on high-level academics, we applied only to what I considered the two best independent (private) high schools in San Francisco for Fall 2010. And, after 4 months of school visits, applications, taking the SSAT test (standard for private high school admission), interviews, and waiting around for the envelopes...she was wait-listed at both. We only really wanted one of the two schools, so we played the wait-list game for another week, chatting with the admissions director of that school often by phone, and waiting for her call. But in the end, my daughter was not admitted.

We have moped a bit. During recent months, we had to get ourselves psyched up for these schools so that she would be a competitive applicant. Inevitably, then, we feel let down that it didn't work out.

But, at least I tried hard for my daughter, and she knows that. You should see the "Transcript & Homeschool Record" I created for her. It's beautiful, and thorough, and I believe that what she has done over 8 years of homeschooling is very impressive. I'll chalk up the huge effort it took me to create it as good training for the real thing: a transcript that will get her into the 4-year college of her choice.

In many ways, that will be much easier. She hasn't yet turned 13, and she's already completed two community college courses with As and will soon complete a third. We have plans for AP tests and SAT II tests, and with those and a bunch of community college credits, there will be plenty of traditional material to put on a high school transcript. Of course, the parts I will cherish will be all of her out-of-the-box activities and achievements. She'll have to talk about all that in her essays.

There is no question that her being one year younger than "normal" for high school age has to have been a factor in her not being accepted. But she is so ready for this level of work. How ironic that she's been able to take community college classes the year she has been 12, and done well in them, but could be seen as too young for high school.

One of the great things about homeschooling, especially if you do it "independently" here in California (by filing a Private School Affidavit, rather than using a charter school program), is that you can accelerate your child as much as you want, as much as is appropriate for him or her. That is what we have done all along, and it has been wonderful. The only difficulties have been in trying to plug her back into supplementary programs that are based on grade levels, and on age levels. Still, we've been able to navigate it all pretty well, most often enrolling her at accelerated levels. Because she is socially mature, that's truly where she fits best, in every respect.

The academic parts of the years ahead look pretty easy to me. My daughter loves being a student and is now really good at managing her schedule and work. And, she's extremely intellectually curious, interested in almost everything. It's a joy to watch her absorbing so much information and being the active learner she has always been, now at such a mature level.

But the social aspects will be daunting. Homeschoolers scoff at the frequent question of outsiders, "What about socialization?" We don't think the questioners actually know the meaning of that word. It's not the noun form of the verb "to socialize" in the sense of "to spend time with friends." It is what is done to a child, not what the child does on her own. My daughter is extremely well "socialized" at this point -- I can take her anywhere (grin). But, having a critical mass of peers for "socializing" is tough. Our plan going forward will involve more arts and theater programs where she can meet others who share her interests.

And, we'll spend more time looking ahead to college. In a couple weeks, we'll take a trip to New York and visit NYU and Columbia (and Barnard, I guess), and see a performance at each university. Oh, yeah, and there's some fun for me, too: We'll be seeing Denzel in August Wilson's "Fences." Ahhhh.